14 things girls think during a Urine Infection

1. So thankful it's my day off. Maybe I should camp out in the bathroom?

2. *pees* Arghhh! Who put razor blades in my food and drinks?!

3. I have a numb arse. Why are toilet seats not soft?

4. Please God let this be no more, I will never take peeing for granted again. 

5. Shit, left my phone downstairs. What am I going to do to entertain myself now for the next hour whilst sat on this retched loo?

6. This bathroom could do with painting.

7. I'm going to cry, i'm going to cry. *Stings*

8. Do I have kidney failure?

9. OMG is that blood? Am i dying? I'm going to Google it. Water infection, blood, cystitis...CANCER?! *Faints*

10. Ah that's better. Time to go downstairs and catch up on Sex and the City. *Stands up, pulls onesie up, walks out the door, feels stinging, turns round, pulls onesie down, sits back on the toilet*

11. I can't remember what it's like to have a social life.

12. Okay, time to look up what home remedies help and what I need to stay away from. Give up alcohol for a week, sugars too - OK, I can do that. Please no, not sex too! Kill me now.

13. Maybe if i walked with my boobs close to my knees, the pain will stay away? Actually, The Quasimodo isn't a good look for me.

14. Hallelujah! Approximately four hours and twenty minutes later, I can finally stand.

Much love, 

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