Life as a 'nit-picker'

A nit picker is someone who picks out certain things that agitate them, annoy them, or simply frustrates them. Other ways to be a nit-picker is when you have OCD and common things just scrape their fingernails on your blackboard.

I am a nit picker, I am, and I can't help it. There are negatives and positives to this habit of mine, I may come off as bitch at times, but sometimes things grind my gears that much I have to say something about it.

Big-ish and small [to me] things that get on my tits:

1. People getting your and you're mixed up.

How hard is it to get you're and your right, seriously? 

Think of it this way:

If something is yours, then the other person would say: "is that your toy?"
If someone is saying a compliment to you or saying things about you, then the person would say: "you're beautiful" or "you're late." As in YOU ARE.

How difficult is that to understand? When typing your 'your's and 'you're's, say it whilst you type it, it is then easier to know the difference. Instantly correcting people as soon as I see this mistake is a must, and if it is not corrected I will feel agitated for the rest of the day; OCD? Maybe.

2. The City Preachers. 

Not the ones who stand there holding a bible and reading a few lines upon request, but rather the ones that stand next to two huge bass-bouncing in-your-face speakers whilst preaching the whole bible into a microphone that you just want to smack them around the head with.

The thing that just agitates me about these type of preachers, is the fact people are forced to listen to them, forced to hear about what they may or may not believe in, forced to walk through the City Centre unable to hear their own trail of thoughts.

Don't get me wrong, I am all for beliefs and religions. I believe in things myself and who knows, there may even be a God out there. I, for one, do not believe in God, however, I do believe in the supernatural. I am no person to judge, so do not judge me.

3. Noises people make whilst chewing and breathing loudly.

This, for a fact, is something so common that almost everyone I bring this subject up to holds up their hands in agreement. How can people be so ill-mannered? 

Okay, some people may have sinus problems and need to breath only out of their mouth, but to those who do not have a problem, learn to breath silently and learn to breath through your nose whilst you chew your god-damn food you utter spanners

4. Bras.

Can't. I just can't. I guess I am a true 90's baby after all; bras are a no go unless I feel I HAVE to wear one with a certain outfit. To me, I would rather let my breasts bounce freely - I have the shape and the size to do so and I don't care who notices my freedom. 

Straps being over my shoulders and buckles on the back pulling in my chest just make me feel like I am being suffocated. Bras agitate me so much, I need to feel like I can breath and not in a restraint jacket all day long. LET ME BE FREE! 

5. Social Media Beggars 

Everyone is an amateur in the beginning of everything, but the amateurs I am referring to are the beggars who don't know Social Media at all. Especially with how it runs, who they are speaking to, how they are speaking to that someone, and what they should and shouldn't do in general. Not forgetting the irritable and punch-in-the-face worthy morons that do your head in. 

Let me just give you a Twitter and/or Instagram example. Now everyone wants followers and crave that attention to have as many followers and likes as possible so that they are 'internet famous,' but when it comes to the annoying amateurs who just scream ATTENTION SEEKER, you just want to point blank block them. 

Yes I am talking about the people who say "follow4follow" and "like4like." One thing I have learnt is that when you do follow them out of sympathy, they then unfollow you. Why? So they look like they have more followers than they are following to mask the fact they are Social Media Beggars.

We all hate them and we all block them.

They need to learn to be creative with their tweets and their pictures on Instagram so they EARN their follows and likes.

6. People who need a dictionary thrown at their heads.

If you can't spell by the time you are twenty years old then I guess it is time you go back to High School, maybe even Primary School, if you can't even spell the most simplest words correctly.

Every day I am surrounded by stupidity. It's just like the your and you're situation. Some people just shouldn't be allowed to leave school unless they can spell, it is so important in your life and career, and even more so necessary when you are trying to teach your kids to be illiterate.

Child: "Mummy, how do you spell sincere?"

Mum: "S-I-N-C-E-A-R"                                                       *slits wrists*

Child: "Daddy how do you spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?"

Dad: "S-U-P-E-R-C-A-N'T be arsed."

(Before I go on, no I didn't spell check illiterate or supercalifragilisticexpialidocious because I am that good. No joke.)

7. People touching and/or moving my stuff

When I leave my things where I know they are, mysteriously it goes missing or has been moved by someone unaware that I just want to slice off their hands for doing so. 

This is even worse when you share a room with your twin AND your little sister - everything gets moved. I can't even deal with people tidying up my room without me, as when my room is messy, I know where everything is - everything has a place. I always remember where I put my things when I last used them, but then some fairy comes along and decides to place it elsewhere.

Grubby hands are the worst, especially when children who have just dug for gold up their nose or just scratched their arse. Please no. Keep away from my things, I do not appreciate snot trails along my phone screen.


8. The boyfriend's ex-Mrs 

*Laughs* You know exactly what I mean. Everyone hates their current boyfriend's ex-Mrs. 

However, when this bird is still partially in your man's life and you can see the stress on his face every time she messages him, you just want to go over to her and tell her what's what and that the bitch needs to back the fuck off. 

No this is not out of jealousy because no would be jealous of her and her attitude, it's the fact that she is some slimy sleaze-bag whom needs to concentrate on her own life and her child, as well as her boyfriend - if she even has one.  

Trying to keep her at the back of your mind, fuck, even out of your mind completely, is almost impossible especially when she still somehow annoys you! 

Ugh, time for a change of subject.

9. Men looking/talking down to/on women 

Understanding equality somehow becomes difficult to the certain men who talk and treat women like shit. How hard is it to want to have equal rights to the women? Do men like to be bigger and earn more money than women, or do men just like the fact they are the 'providers' and women 'should stay at home to cook, clean, and look after the children?'

Last time I checked, I swear we were in the 21st Century. 

I have had plenty of arguments with men who think they are bigger and better than women, I have had arguments where men have ganged up and tried to belittle me in public forums, I have had men argue with me once I stood up for myself and what I believe in.

When did it become wrong for women to voice their own opinions and fight for equality?

Women have as much human rights as men, yet we are still treated so unfairly. Women deserve respect.

10. Adverts during films

Nope, can't even talk about how irritating this is. 

Actually I can

Literally, I could kiss the people who created Sky Movies & BBC who came up with the idea that there should be a ten or fifteen minute interval between each film to get all the adverts out of the way. ITV, Channel 4 & 5, etc, take note, follow in their footsteps. For god's sake, put the adverts at the end of each film.

How annoying is it for you when you are enjoying your film and it's starts getting tense, getting good, and then BAM the adverts begin for three minutes. Film ruined.

WHY WOULD YOU PUT ADVERTS DURING FILMS? Please, please, for the love of humanity STOP this! 

11. People who have no dress sense

Unorthodox and unique is what I love in everyone and everything, but when it comes to people who just can't dress for shit, then it becomes a problem. 

There are people out there who blatantly don't own a mirror or have no dress sense, especially when they walk out of their front door looking like Charlie Brown or Shrek. Oh lord, one-shaded brown clothes with black pumps - i've seen it. I am scarred for life.

Don't even get me started on the Chavvy "wanna-be bad-mans" that walk down the street with their snap-backs, three-striped Adidas tracksuit tops, bottoms, jackets, and trainers, with their batman boxers showing as their pants have mysteriously decided to slide down to the guy's knees. Lads, it is not a good look, women like their men groomed and suited & booted.

As a nit-picker, I sadly have to admit that I do in fact pick out things I hate on a person's outfit.. Honestly, if I can't pick anything out, then you, my friend, are one hell of a dresser and deserve a standing ovation. 

12. Buffering

Ever been searching on the internet and it has been buffering for the last five minutes? Ever been on a road trip and needed a map because you're lost but your Google Maps is buffering? Ever felt my frustration with either of these?

Swear to God, if my internet is running slow, I will instantly either throw my phone or give it to my friend to suffer with the buffering. If my mobile internet doesn't work or is running slow, then I will switch it to Wifi. However, if it is still running slow, then hell has just broke loose. 

Obsessive Internet Disorder. Is this a thing? If not, it should be because I have it. Everyday I am on the internet for hours on end searching my Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Facebook Page, Blogger, Wordpress, Dayre, Emails, Google+, and occasionally using SnapChat. 

There is no end to my use of the internet, so if the buffering starts, so does the agitation and frustration. I can't not be on the internet for more than three days, as I feel a little insane by the end of those days. Buffering is awful.

Last but not least

13. Slow walkers

Excuse me. Hello? Please can I just squeeze past? Or can you pick up the pace? FOR FUCK'S SAKE MOVE YOUR ARSE OUT OF MY WAY BITCH!

We have all been there so don't even say I am nasty or fail to attempt to tell me you are some do-gooder. I am not a fast walker, per se, but I am not some tortoise plodding along like I have all the time in the world to get from point A to B.

Has anyone noticed that the slow walkers come out of hibernation when you happen to be in a rush? It's just like Taxi's, buses, or metrolink trams - they all take the piss when you need to be somewhere. Ain't nobody got time for that.

I don't even understand how anyone can honestly walk so slow, which makes me question them. Are they doing this purposely? Do they want to ruin someone's day? I completely understand if you have trouble walking or need assistance, but if you have two perfectly fine working legs, then what is your excuse?

As a nit-picker, you can see my frustrations with everyday life. Almost everything and everyone annoys me and I am pretty hard to please, unless you give me food, then I love you because I love food. All foods. I should be fat. 

Simple things like spelling mistakes, dress sense, adverts during films, bras, chewing & breathing, and slow walkers all become an impossible thing to get over or even try and ignore. I think I have some type of OCD, or am I just like everyone else? 

What grinds your gears?

Much love,


  1. The slow walkers...don't even get me started.grrr

  2. pretty sure you can't talk to anyone about spelling when the top of your blog says 'contant me'

    1. omg haha i didn't even realise! Thanks for pointing it out though, good eye

  3. Good one, can relate to a few, especially men looking down on women. Very inspiring post to me! Yeah, and it is just so nice to unbuckle that bra when you get home.haha.

    1. Thanks riley :) yeah exactly, you can fibally breath and be free of any restraints haha


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