Female Guide to: Male Communication

Ever wondered what your man is thinking and why he is so distant when all you want to do is talk to him about problems whether it's yours or his? Ever wondered why there is a saying: "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus? Thankfully, I have written a Guide for you Females.

This will help avoid common arguments by bettering your understandings of how males communicate. This is the Female Guide to Male Communication.


Men want to give information while remaining independent of the other party.


  1. are comfortable telling others what to do and appear "superior."
    Women: think about Christian Grey in Fifty Shades. This is who men think they are and always will be - just give them the satisfaction. On a serious note, men have always liked to feel 'manly' and more 'high up' as well as 'the man of the house.' Just leave him to it, you get your benefits out of it.
  2. want to get straight to the bottom line and choose without consulting
    Women: this is your worst nightmare. Where was you involved in the decision making? Give them the benefit of the doubt at first; men like to show expertise, maybe just give them a little bit of advice and let them know you would like to be involved before he 'bottom lines' it.
  3. communicate to give information, solve problems, and show expertise
    Women: this contradicts Point 2, however, this could mean he is communication with his friends / work friends to help solve a problem he cannot solve himself. If he asks you for help, then feel appreciated as this comes once in a blue moon.
  4. use fewer words and express fewer feelings
    Women: this may rattle your cage, but would you rather he was dramatic and over-board than getting straight to the point of how he was feeling? Maybe once he has expressed how he feels, you could ask or give subtle hint that you would like to know more. Give him the option of coming to talk to you when he feels ready.
  5. think through a problem privately, then express the solution as the bottom line
    Women: see point 2
  6. give feedback directly with bluntness, without the intention that it should be taken personally
    Women: if you take his verbal rejection or any advice/feedback personally, he doesn't mean it like that. Don't start moaning and moping, ask him if he really meant it the way you felt it, if he says no, then he really didn't mean it like that. Men are sensitive too and don't like knowing they hurt you in any way.
  7. tend to finish a topic before going onto the next
    Women: this is great news for you when all you want to do is talk about a certain topic, however, when you start being a female and start trailing off to a different subject unintentionally, don't be surprised when he jumps back to his point.
  8. talk more about what they did, where they went etc. rather than about relationships
    Women: we knew this already. Likewise, this is great when you want to take your mind off relationships and want to talk about something else for a change. This is why women have guy mates as they can communicate on a different level than women.
  9. hardly take verbal rejection personally
    Women: take advantage, repeat, take advantage! Seriously though, even though men are sensitive and are deeply emotional, take this into consideration too.
  10. hate asking for help
    Women: the manual would either be in your hands, or he would have burnt it because "men know best" after all. Am I right?
  11. appear less intuitive and aware of details than women
    Women: we know this is correct. We are more aware of details than men; we are good at remembering who wore what, and who said what, on what day. However, this is down to men thinking and absorbing information differently to women.
  12. have an analytical approach to problems
  13. use few voice tones and facial expressions when communicating
    Women: Men look stern when they are communicating, however, this does not mean you have done anything wrong or you are getting a lecture, men just aren't as openly expressive as women.
  14. make direct statements: no "going around the houses."
    Women: thank god! Have you ever spoke to a woman and asked her what's wrong or what has happened? You get the whooooooole story. F that, get straight to the point so I can help you!
  15. can't read minds
    Women: we often forget this, purposely. Seriously, men find us complicated and when they don't know what is up with us, they really mean it. Go on ladies, give them some hints.
  16. don't remember details
    Women: men aren't as skilled at us with memory. Men can only just remember what they have had for breakfast.
  17. would rather have help with a problem first, then the compassion
    Women: remember, men are blunt, they like the bottom line first. Give them your compassion and a shoulder to cry on after you have given them advice and helped them.
  18. Men compartmentalise, mentally and emotionally, separating work relationships, etc.
    Women: let him concentrate on one topic at a time, even if you start to trail off, snap back into reality - he is talking, not you.
  19. When men feel stressed, he often stops talking altogether for a period of time.
    Women: Perfect for when you want some alone time to do the things you've been dying all day to do; read a book; write a poem; blog; bake some cakes; paint etc. Eventually, you will have to go back to your fella and keep him company, especially after he has stopped being stressed. If he is not stressed once you have had your alone time, ask him what is wrong and if there is anything you can do to help.
  20. are sensitive and have deep emotions too yet they are not always comfortable showing them
    Woman: if you are anything like me and have a boyfriend like Alexander, then you will get frustrated that he isn't as open as you wish and have to pretty much beg for him to open up - you will realise my stress. Men are very emotional, which is why he walks away when you are arguing, or when he lights up a cigarette, rather than completely open up to you and express his emotions.
  21. When men say: "i'm fine."
    Women: When a man says he is fine, he really is fine. Men are straight forward and blunt remember. He will tell you if you or anyone else has pissed him off. However, if he has been doing some DIY and he has smacked himself with a hammer and says he is fine, then he really isn't and doesn't want to come off as a wimp.
  22. When men say: "nothing."
    Women: When a man says nothing, he really means nothing. Literally, he could be thinking about the cobweb swaying to and fro in the breeze, or he could just be relaxing with no issues.
  23. When men say: "I Love You."
    Women: Men hold their feelings back and we know this for a fact, so when I man says he loves you, he really (from the bottom of his heart) means it. Men don't openly express like women and finds it extremely difficult to open up especially when it comes to love and relationships. If he tells you he loves you and you don't feel the same, let him down gently, but if you feel the same, don't ever break his heart. He loves hard. 

Now, Females, I hope you understand your man more of how he thinks, communicates, and ticks. Hopefully, this stops most of your unnecessary arguments you wish to have avoided in the first place. Honestly, I taught myself a few things and I realised it's not just me in all this. 

However, I would say I know men better than I know women; I have grown up with a group of lads and never really got on with women - I am on the same wave length as men. Both males and females come to me for relationship and/or gender advice and I can always answer. I wouldn't call myself a 'Guru' but I know my stuff.

Much love,


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